Eighteen years ago today, I walked into my home church and married my beautiful wife. She was simply beautiful. Her hair was just right. Her makeup was flawless and everything we wanted for that day came true. It was a beautiful beginning to our marriage together. Eighteen year later, she is still beautiful and her hair and makeup still looks good but that is not why I am still married today. How many of you know that at some point Cinderella looses her glass slipper and the Prince turns back into a frog? If you have been with any person in a relationship, you will experience good and bad times and wonder why I did this?
I believe there are several reasons why we are still together. Love is one but is not enough. Sometimes I can’t stand her and sometimes she hates my guts. Another reason is she still looks good to me. She has appeal but neither of us look like we did on our wedding day. So, physical attraction is not enough. Could it be finances? Well, I am sorry to report, we still have not hit the lottery. I married middle class and I am still middle class and have to go to work everyday to keep things going right. I know you know what it is now, “Is it because we are both Christians?” I still make her angry. She makes me angry and sometimes we don’t act like a Christian couple. There were times in my marriage I was very inconsiderate and extremely selfish. I did what I wanted to do “In the Name of Lord” and was just as wrong as George Zimmerman but we are still together. Being a Christian is important and it is how we resolve our conflicts based on what the Word of God teaches us to do.
The main reason I believe that we are still together is one word, commitment. I am committed to my wife and I believe she is committed to me. We love each other and love our kids and most importantly, we love our God but to remain with the same person for this long a period of time it has been our commitment to each other and our commitment to my family.
My wife has told me that she wanted to leave me on several times. I have entertained the thought of leaving. Wondering what the grass is like on the other side just because there is always someone putting there goodies in your face. There is always someone telling you what you are not getting at home. Temptation and flattering lips and hips have killed a lot of marriages. If you are happy with your spouse but they have flaws and your neighbor, friend, co-worker , or church member seems just like the perfect person for you- Always considerate, always complimentary, always telling you what your spouse is not doing. That person is a marriage killer and is used by satan himself to destroy your life. Ask yourself this question, “Why would God send me a perfect person when I am so jacked up?” Nobody is perfect. You can go to someone else but they have issues too.
This morning as I celebrate the blessing that God has given me. I am so thankful. I am thankful because my wife is committed to me. I am thankful today because I want to be committed to my wife . I desire to be committed to her. I love her and I love what she has given me. Neither she or myself is perfect and she really can make me angry unlike any person on this earth but she is mine and I love her so much. I love her for being with me when it was difficult to do. I love her because she has allowed me to grow and to develop into manhood. I love her because she has given me chance after chance to prove myself. I realized I did not know how to love for real. Yes, I was always good in bed but she taught me how to love. She has taught me how to share and give. She has taught me to stand up and have confidence in myself. She has given me the gift of fatherhood. She cooks and cleans and provides meals for me and my family. Erica, my sweet wife turned my house into a home. She did it!
So to all the men and women always putting your goodies in folk faces, you don’t know me. You do not know my struggles and you do not know my pain. The men and women that always up in my wife face telling her about what I am not doing. You don’t know me! You don’t know her! All you know is the image and the mirror that reflects off of my work and her work that we have done for each other all these years. If any married person is doing good things it is because someone has invested in them and allowed them to grow and flourish. My wife’s commitment to me has allowed me to be and become a good man. So do you really want some of this?
Commitment is a __________.
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Happy Anniversary Baby!
Brother Clarence
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